This week I began work on Fury of the Falcon, Book 5, and the last installment, of the Falcons Saga. Which means that I dragged out the last block of paper that contains the Saga's original twelve-yr-old draft and am giving it the once-over, so that I can remember what happens and why. Since I don't. I've slept since then. A lot. Like if I add it up, I've slept almost six years, and written other things for the other six. So yeah... I need the reminder.
This has led to a couple days of outlining, brainstorming, groaning, and swallowing puke, since the old draft stinks worse than last week's garbage. It's 12-yr-old garbage.
|It's so gross it's like sucking lemons till your teeth fall out.|
So to begin, here's this writer's account of manuscript overhaul:
In only two days, I've gone through the entire ms and marked all the main events with stickies. The block of paper now thinks it is a porcupine's cousin. Have read through the first 100 pages or so and discovered what I feared -- the text amounts to a massively detailed outline. It's almost all tell and almost no show. It's atrocious. It's beyond atrocious. It's puke-worthy. Some of the dialog is fun, but that's the extent of the text's usefulness.
To attempt to remedy this pukiness, I've brainstormed the opening sequence, to completely reorganize the info, increase emotional tension, and cut the boring CRAP that plagues the ms like boils on a monkey's ass.
So far, I've found elements to cut, and scenes to add:
Spoiler Warning! (I'll try to leave things vague and cryptic, regardless)
Old content to cut:
* the Great Summoning, whatever the hell that is. Something that tries to sound significant, but isn't.
* Ice Elves. We don't need no more damned elves, okay? We got enough already. Give all dialog and action to Daryon, Miragi, or Dagni.
New content to add (spoilers, really, stop reading now):
* Thorn must test his invention on an unlucky test subject. Evil scientists, beware. There's a pissed avedra on the loose.
* Thorn and Daryon must put their inventions together, which makes foes even more unlucky.
* Kethlyn must deal with the rebellion on his hands, but he's drunk, so it won't go well. Where's Mum when he needs her?
* Valryk must get out of that dungeon cell. Old lovers prove useful after all. He then must go on a journey of twisted self-discovery and vengeance. I mean, it's everyone else's fault that he tried to have them murdered.
* Lothiar must expend his rage against his own people.
* Dax must try to sway Alyster to do nefarious things.
And that's not including all the content that remains (like Carah's storyline) and must be overhauled to match a more mature, sober tone.
Just to add, I've realized that this is the volume that will read like a George RR Martin episode. If a character is slated to die, they will mostly all die within the same hundred pages or so. (Yeah, I can think of 5 main or side characters that have it coming. Don't curse me, it's not my fault.) It will be over-the-top drama and bloodshed. Delightful.