Showing posts with label personal explorations. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personal explorations. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 7, 2019

Hands of the Potter

So given the current season I'm walking through, it seemed appropriate to heed my husband's advice and drag out my pottery stuff again. The goal is to craft enough inventory to actually sell. What that looks like, I have no idea.

Anyway, here's the gist. I took two ceramics courses back in college as electives--both hand-building and wheel--and LOVED it. We're talking twenty years ago. In my late twenties, I accumulated my own supplies to throw pots in the dubious comfort of my garage (as a result of icky circumstances that I won't describe online). Then came the novel project. Everything else, all hobbies, friends, family, everything, was set aside so I could finish the Falcons Saga.

Now that the novels are complete, and with the LegendFire Community shut down, I sank into a horrible place of purposelessness. No people and few characters to care for, I realized I was suffering something very closely related to Empty Nest Syndrome.

So now, twice in my life, has pottery stepped in as a source of rest and rejuvenation. I admit, writing, as much as I love it, does not produce this restful feeling. Struggling for words, for plot, for conflict, fills me with tension, if not outright frustration. Not so the pots.

Currently, I have no place to set up my wheel. I mean, it's a hundred degrees in my garage right now, and I'd like my CAR to live in the garage where it belongs, so sans studio, I am hand-building mugs and other things in the cool of my dining room.

wet three-legged mugs
I can't wait to see these mugs glazed and finished.

The firing end of things has turned into a more frustrating venture. Over the past couple of days, I had carefully glazed some test pieces, mainly to see how my new glazes blend (or don't), and to see if my old Paragon kiln is still in working order. However...

I get everything ready, wake up excited to begin, only to discover that the shelves and supports I thought I had, I no longer have. Couldn't find them anywhere. I see my entire day and my hope to see results by nightfall slipping down the gutter. Ugh. So ... I have ordered new kiln shelves and posts.

Setbacks and delays. Which seems to be the running theme of the entire summer. Not a big deal in this instance, but when delays continue to stack up, they feel more dire than they really are.

Maybe I'll get to test-fire next week?

Point is, so many life applications to be found in pottery. For a pot to be made beautiful, it must be turned upside down and have the ugly excess trimmed off. Too often do I find myself the pot in the hands of my Potter. Yet the trimming shows infinite care and loving, purposeful intention.

Isaiah 64:8

Monday, October 2, 2017

A Change of Seasons

A big summer with lots of changes afoot. First, seven years of working on my novel project came to a close. First anchor raised. Second, on Saturday night I closed LegendFire's doors, after 8 years of caring for the community. Second anchor raised.

Tough changes but good ones. There are times I definitely feel adrift in unsteady waters, without a compass or land in sight. Scary, depressing, exhilarating.

Third, I turned 40 this September. Very little that I had hoped for or imagined about my life has turned out. Terrifying.

Right now all possibilities are on the table. So much freedom is overwhelming and a bit daunting. Attempts to write new things have been hit and miss. My brain is fighting for rest, and I try to be gentle and grant it. But I can't just wait for new inspiration to strike. Been playing with a story about my tragic bard. Submitting his first adventure. No luck so far. Almost but not quite a couple of times. It's a novella, though, so no surprise. There just aren't enough markets for fiction that length.

Also trying to become involved in a couple of other writing forums. None will feel like home, I'm afraid unless I'm willing to dive in all the way and get my hands dirty with discussions and crits. ... Betting I need time away from that sort of thing, too. Nothing wrong with a vacay to recharge the desire to help humanity and seek help in return.

In the meantime, lots of prayer, lots of Bible study, lots of meditation and refocusing about life.

So seasons change. The trick is to find joy in the shifting colors.